Enough People

I am tired of everyone complaining about Christmas and Holiday decorations being out and up before Dec 1st.
Just stop.
What does it matter if the stores have out Christmas stuff before Halloween is even over, or if your neighbours put lights up. It is pretty. It makes people happy when it can be a pretty dressing time of year.
Here in Canada November can be so depressing. Fall is pretty much over, no more yellow/orange/red leafs. Just bare trees and dead grass. It's grey and cold and wet.
If you walk into a store and it smells like Cinnamon and you see red all over and holiday jolly music playing softly in the background do this... close your eyes. Take a deep breath and remember what this season is about.
Family
Joy
Giving Back
Love
Happiness

When I see my neighbour putting lights up I think "oh smart, this will be the last warm weekend we have till Spring next year, good call buddy."
Not "Ugh it's not even Dec, what a dick for putting pretty lights out that make everything look like a wonderland!"

STOP BEING SO NEGATIVE.
We are very lucky people, whom ever is reading this. You can go to the store and get food/clothing, you have a home/place to live that is not a tent or box, you can turn on a tap and drink the water, you can see a doctor, you can chose your schools to send your offspring.
WE ARE LUCKY.

So please. Before you complain about Holiday decorations or anything inane like that take a look at your life, pause ... and be grateful.


Or I will send the Grinch to go pee on your car handle.

Kids VS No Kids

Why is it a battle???
Let me explain.
A friend of mine posted this on his facebook.

http://www.mandatory.com/2014/07/08/an-average-saturday-morning-with-kids-vs-without-kids

He said "Right side, hands down!" Part of it made me laugh, others made me cringe. I wanted to write "Ryan would never act like this, its all how you raise a kid yada yada yada." Then it struck me. Maybe he is tired of his family assuming him and his wife want to have kids, maybe they are trying and not having any luck, maybe he JUST DOESN'T want to have kids. Or maybe it was just a funny thing is saw and it made him laugh.
Then I looked at the comments. WOW... I don't know the people that responded but goddamn, they are coming off as crazy breeders. Take a JOKE people. If your kid even remotely acted like this he is an ASSHOLE and you should feel bad. :D


SO I sent this link to my friend and told him he should post it to see if more people freak out.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4AhGvR0143s
HEH.

New school, round 3

We switched schools for Ryan at the end of his school year and now starting into Summer school.
So far I feel good about it. I am not sure if it is that I am in the better place (emotionally), Neil and I are in a better place, or its just timing.
When we moved Ryan from Peekaboo to a Montessori school we thought he would like it. It had uniforms (so cute) and great teachers.

Something we did not think about too much was that we had just moved a few months before (while being homeless for a month) WRITEN HERE or that it was the middle of a school year would be such huge issues.
Ryan did NOT do well. Now he was learning and he was growing and changing and he was also have behavioural issues. BAD ones.
Around March/April the owner and principle of the school meet with us. Ryan had pushed a kid and he hit his head on a table. The kid was okay but that was the last straw for the school. We were giving till the end of the school year and we were not allowed to come back. I was sad about this because I loved his teacher. She was sick (like spent the night in the hospital) and she STILL called me at work and talked for 45 min with me about Ryan. After seeing we were on the same page the only thing we could do to change was start having time out with him. That helped but we were looking at time out 3 times in the course of 2 hours sometimes. It was brutal.
Do not raise your voice, stay calm, be there but do not engage until he has calmed down. it is SUPER hard.
Happy to say he is MUCH better, today was the first full on melt down in almost a month. (during soccer). He cried and grunted in the car but no screaming or hitting me. After we had a very good talk.
Maybe its that he is 3 and we give him more freedom. Maybe he feels that I am a happier person (running, eating better, its summer so I don't have the winter blues).

Back to my original thought, Ryan's first day of school was July 2nd. We walk in and right away we see Sloane there. (THANKYOU!) Ryan runs over to her and hold her hand. We go together to put Ryan's stuff in his cubby slot. I ask Sloane to show Ryan how the water dispenser works and introduce myself to the teachers again, warn them of his forgetting to pee and give Ryan a big hug and kiss (and Sloane too) and tell him to be kind, use his words and have an awesome day.

He wears no uniforms in the school, also because its summer its much more chill (a better way to introduce him) and he has Sloane with him in the morning and afternoon. She is 8 months older and is transitional into the older class. But they have those 2 hours together. I am so grateful for her. They can sometimes be a bad influence on each other but she is also a huge calming part of his life. Someone he has always known. And someone he loves.

(splash)

So far its going so great, he likes his teachers and he even got an invite to a party from this super cute little boy that told me Ryan and Sloane are his best friends (OMG so cute).
Overall things are going great. I really hope it keeps up! Oh crap. I hear him waking up from nap. More to update later. I promise to keep this up better starting now. Ryan is changing so much and saying the funnest things and sweetest things "you are a pretty princess mommy!"
I have to keep track of this awesome kid.

A great Breastfeeding Article.

http://www.motherhoodandmore.com/2013/08/whats-so-hard-about-covering-up-to.html?showComment=1402572140878#c6130250679725978680

This is perfect

Conversations with Ryan

The other night, in the shower with Ryan (he likes showers now, not baths), I was pointing at my belly stretch marks telling him be used to live in my belly. When he was a very small baby he was in my belly and I took care of him. I told him "I used to hug you so tight and tell you how much I loved you and its nice I can hug you and tell you now, but before I even meet you I loved you and I loved feeling you moving in my belly."
Ryan says "oh mommy thats nice, when I was a baby in you I was hugging you too"

*CRIES* So that is why you moved around so much.
Little dude, do not grow up!

Tonight at bedtime he was telling me about his day. I was kissing his hands.
He says "do not eat me up mommy."
I said "I am not eating you up I am kissing you, sometimes I do want to eat you up though cause you are so delicious!"
He laughs and says "no mommy I am NOT licious, I am gross and sweaty!!"

This kid.
He is so damn funny.

Back into it working out that is

I f'ed it up people. I f'ed it up good. Last year at this point I was 15lbs lighter then I am now.
And that was just with diet. I started my tracking 20 days ago with MyFitnessPal I highly recommend this app. Its awesome. I have friends on there and we cheer each other on. It helps knowing I have people seeing I worked out and I was under my calorie goal.
Last year was better cause Neil was doing it with me. We both tracked and seeing him workout motivated me to work out. Now its all on me. I have no partner but like Neil says I can not get fit for HIM I have to do it for me. And he is right. I felt so good last year. Last summer was amazing cause I was not as hot, I wasn't sweating as much, I could wear shorter shorts and not feel my thighs rubbing together. (they still touched but not down near my knees).

Right now what is keeping me honest and on track is that we are going on a cruise in 29 days and my summer stuff from last year needs to fit. Can not afford to get new clothing and I threw away all my 'fat' summer stuff.
I also know I will not track on my vacation. I will eat what I want and enjoy my food, not go super bad (fries with every meal) cause losing it SO HARD but I will have beer, ice cream, butter and wonderful french toast with syrup. Not to mention the cold fruit soups. OMG
I will have a fun time, I will be active.

I will be comfortable in my own skin this summer. I have to work for it but guess what, I should not have had cookies at every meal for the month of December. And if I do this year I HAVE TO WORKOUT.

My life will be a balance of healthy foods (with being 'bad' now and then) and working out everyday. Just is the way it has to be. I also find out when I work out I am a LOT less angry. I keep my cool much better.



Lets be this again... (last year in the summer when I was fit and my wedding dress was WAY to big)
<---- woowoo!

What I was when I was engaged and very heavy. (not what I am right now but sometimes I feel it)

<----- yucky!














And to be honest I am in the obese range right now (via myfitnesspal) I am okay with being 'slightly overweight' but obese is so bad for my long term health.

So guess what Mary. WORK OUT THAT ASS and work it off. Get fit, no stroke in my future damn it. I want a less sweaty summer this year again.

The Other F Word

Stepping out of my mom aspect of my life for a moment.
I keep hearing about a woman named "Kate Upton" So I looked her up. Wow what a very very pretty young woman.

Then I saw Kate Upton is fat. ARE YOU KIDDING?
Is this amazingly stunning, healthy looking woman is fat I am screwed.
She might not have a 'thigh gap' or 'bikini bridge' but I would kill to have her body.

People are insane.
Rib bones are not sexy.

Knee bones sticking out are not attractive. A woman that starves herself is not appealing. It makes me so sad these woman and young girls with so many body issues (and men and boys). We should focus on HEALTHY eating and being active and staying strong of body and mind.

sometimes society makes me barf in my mouth a little.

Sickness strikes again

Last night Ryan woke up at 1am crying. Neil went in to check on him and I hear Neil go "Oh my god" and he brings Ryan into our room.
I find out Ryan is burning hot and shaking. We take off his clothing, check his fever (awesome almost 104), give him Tylenol, and then I take him into a warm shower with me.
We brought it down to about 102 and had him in bed with us. He wakes up A LOT complaining of pain in his legs, his tummy hurts and coughing. Poor guy didn't get much sleep.
This morning at 6am we wake up to him crying again because the fever came back (104) so back into the shower with mom, Advil this time and now he is down to 102 (about) and playing with his pirate ship.

I knew changing schools would bring the sickness back (pink eye last week). But I feel bad we have both missed so much work. I guess I have to work extra extra hard when I am at work so co-workers don't get pissed. Thankfully my manager has a kid so she knows how it goes, also I have so much vacation time and sick leave its okay.

Fingers crossed its just an infection. We are doing the wait and see. He doesn't want to eat anything but it's still early. He did drink a lot of water so that's good. Poor guy. He is at least playing and happy. Just gets really pissed if you offer him food or anything to drink. I am doing the "just let him be" part of the sickness. Laster today I am going to do the "please eat some of the soup grandma made this weekend or have a drink." pushy part. Maybe I can entice him with a movie. :)