Worst dream ever

Just woke up to a phone call telling me no Zumba today due to March Break. Perfect timing of a phone call.


In the dream things were great. We had a nice house (Neil, Ryan and I) and Neil convinced me to volunteer at a community home helping people out. Mentaly challenged, depressed, bad home situations and abuse cases. About a week goes by and my childhood friend Heather comes in. We were so happy to see each other. We were catching up when she told me they wanted me to live there. They showed me a very nice room and said it would be for just me. I told them that was sweet but I was living with my husband and son, why would I live apart from them? Neil comes into the room and tells me that he thinks it would be good for me to live there and I can help out full time. I start to get scared and I ask if he is trying to divorce me. Him and Heather look at each other. She starts to pull stuff off the shelf like Ryan's birth announcement my mom made us. I start to get pissed asking why that is here... Neil starts to cry and turns to me and says "Monkey, Ryan has been dead for over a year."
I start to freak out and I am screaming "no he isn't I just took him to day care today!"
Neil starts to really cry and Heather came over to me and hugs me. Then the phone woke me up.


Worst dream ever.


When I was telling Neil the dream just now I started to cry so hard I choked on getting out the "Ry is dead" part. That is how I know my period will be here soon. 
heh