Mean Parents?

Are we mean parents? Today was an Easter egg hunt (well chocolate eggs were thrown on a field and the kids got to grab them all). Ryan had the most chocolate out of all the kids. He didn't know it was candy. Hell at one point he saw me throw a tissue in the garbage and he threw an egg in. He gave most of them away to the other kids and he was just excited about the colours. "Look yellow mommy, BLUE!"

However when I told him I had a Banana he went craycray. "NANA! BANANA MOMMY YES PLEASE PLEASE!" and ate it all down while I was carrying him, just so super happy. He was also very worried about getting a balloon (which we did, a yellow one).

He has had sugar before, we have cake sometimes at family events and he has had chocolate before (halloween & Christmas). I don't want him to know what it is, I don't want him to WANT it. I really dont want him to demand it or expect it.
That being said are we mean? He will be 2 in 18 days. I have always been a little... careful about what he eats. I did get lazy for a bit and let him eat a lot of empty carbs (goldfish/graham crackers.)

He was 34 pounds at 18 months old. That's really big. Yes he was tall but the doctor told us he might be an obese child if we are not careful. Well I am happy to say he is going to be 2 very soon and he is still 34 pounds. I stopped giving him crackers and gave him cucumber to hold him over till dinner was made. The past month Rasins has been his big thing. Which is fine with me, helps him poop. Oh and berries. Holy wow this kid can eat a pint of blackberries in 3 minutes and with a purple stained mouth and fingers ask "please mommy more tank you."

So are we mean parents? Are we setting him up to only want to eat sugar sweetness when he is older? Who knows. All I know is I breastfeed him for 14 months, made all his baby food (other then carrots cause I always burned them and prunes) and tried to make sure he eats a good amount of healthy foods.  I really dont want to mess it all up now!!!
I also get super pissed at daycare when they give him those damn cheese doodles things or juice and have told them DO NOT give them to him. Made me happy when I caught the teachers giving him orange slices.

Wow really hard Easter egg hunt. :P

YELLOW MOMMY!

Star Wars Easter? Sure WHY NOT!

After brunch he was very fast to pass out, like 3 min later fast. Helped it was 90 min past nap time.

Oh on that note time to make his basket (a new book, colouring book, Kinder Surprise eggs with Hot Wheels car in them and plastic eggs with Goldfish crackers). Then time for this mom to take some cold medication and pass out. Two nights up coughing. Antibiotics are working just taking some time and I really could use a good night 'sleep'.

HAPPY EASTER EVERYONE!

Bye dad!!!

Neil is traveling for a few days for work. We carpool and when I went to get Ryan from school we go out to the car and soon as I open it "HI DADDY!" and then Ry starts looking around. I tell him its just the two of us for a few days and we will see daddy on the phone tonight.

We get home Ryan goes running inside after I take off his boots "Daddy!!! NNNEEEEIIIILLLLLL!!!!" (Ryan has started to call Neil by his name which he is not pleased with). I had to explain again, daddy is not home but he will be back soon.

Neil facetimes with us a little, its pretty spotty but Ryan was so happy. After his bath he was calling again for Neil. Our routine is I give Ry a bath, Neil preps the milk for bed. I told him again it's just the two of us and to keep being nice to mom. He nods and asks for his milk.

Ryan slept all night till 5:50am which I count myself lucky for since he was up the night before at 3am, 4am, 530am and out of bed at 6am. Not to mention he went to bed at 7pm last night which is pretty early.

I gave him a bottle of  milk and took a shower. I get out of the shower to him crying. I go in and his diaper leaked pee so he is cold. I get him on the change table and I ask him if he would like a new night shirt. "yes mama" we do that... 

"ryan would you like some pants for your cold legs?" 

"yes mama"

"Okay buddy we can do that. After we get dressed we can say hi to cars."1

I open the blinds in his room and we look out the window and Ryan right away "Mama a bus".

I go over there and say "Lets wave at the people on the bus Ry."

Ryan comes back with "hi people, lots of people on the bus mama, lots."

We do into the livingroom he begs for a box of raisins. As I sit down with my computer to check email he is eating raisins at his table looking out the window.

 I say, "Hey Ryan, that is the only box you get today, THATS IT for raisins, yes?"

He looks right at me nodding "thats it mama, thats it."

WOW he has grown.

Citizen

Tomorrow I become a Candian Citizen. Crazy.
Well I will have dual citizenship (U.S. also).

Ill write out how it went. I am pretty excited.

Sweet morning

Ryan slept in till 7:45 which was very nice after being out so late at a co-workers x-mas party where we sung a lot on a karaoke machine.

So far this morning I taught Ryan to say cheers after hitting cups together, his water cup my coffee. He knows that mom drinks COFFEEEEEE in the morning. He was trying to play ball with our cat Roag, he helped me with the laundry.
Its awesome. He is talking more and more every day and we are understanding more.

We are about to go out and do a little home and christmas shopping. I just wanted to do a fast update.

Our teacher at his school (aka day care), Miss Anna was even saying this week Ryan has jumped in developmental milestones. She was saying at lunch another boy was crying for his water and Ryan goes "Jeremy, go water" and was pointing at the little container they keep all the water cups in. They keep it low on a table so the kids can go and grab their own cup. She said it was funny cause Ryan was all "Gee dude, you want you water just go get it, its right there, no need to cry about it."

We had to sign reports about Ryan biting and hitting other kids on Monday, it was embarrassing. Well on Wednesday one of the little girls Judy went up and HIT another girl Chloe. Twice. (While we where there.)Chloe was crying so I told Ryan "see now Chloe is crying cause she was hurt, she ouch cause Judy hurt her. Why dont you go give Chloe a hug and let her know it will be okay."
Ryan went over and they hugged each other for a min. Ryan comes back to me and I say "see you made Chloe happy by being nice to her, not hurting or ouching her, hugs are very nice buddy."
He smiled at me.

He hasn't hit or bit anyone since. Fingers crossed it sticks. He is 19 months old, soon to be 20 months.
We are going to Florida soon. Can not wait for my mom and dad to see him. My mom was here in Oct but my dad hasn't seen him in 13 months. He has changed A LOT.

:D

Shit he is getting smart he wanted on the couch so he grabbed a pillow off the couch to put on the floor to give him a lift. damn it. Smart kid is getting smart. Proud and worried at the same time, welcome to the life of a mom.

Hitting and Biteing

WOW

On the way to bath he bite me hard enough to leave a wicked mark and when I said OUCH! He slapped me. I put him on the change table and I held his face and told him he hurt mom and he hit mom and why would be do that? We do not bite or hit, I told him he hurt me again and mom would NEVER hurt him cause I love him so why would he hurt mom so much? He looked right at me sort of sad looking and said "Im sorry." Not sorry but I am sorry.

wow.

just wow.

I told him it was okay and he should be sorry for hurting mom but when we are upset we should use our words. I told him I know he is tired and coughing (not feeling great) but he should not hurt mom. I said I was happy we talked and he understood I asked him if we can high five for talking so we did. Then I asked if he understood he should talk to mom, he nodded and we went off to the bath.

it was pretty good.

I am so happy he understands me. He gets it. He knows he hurt me, he knows he shouldn't. Because of that I know he will hit me, sometimes by accident  sometimes when he is mad, but we can talk about it.

I love that.

When he is tired or not feeling well he regresses. He stops using words too and just grunts at stuff. I think I let him go past his bed time also. He didn't nap much at school so I am to blame for it a little. The first clue should have been around 6:45 when he stopped saying "apple" and "food" and started grunting and screaming a little. I kept saying "Bud, do you want apple? Do you want cracker? Do you want food or drink?" and he just kept doing this grunt and high pitch squeal. Oh well, none of us are perfect but we both tried. :D

Holy shit that bite hurt.

Election Eve, Halloween and changes

I am hopeful. I am hopeful my country men will make the right choice. However I am also worried.
I think this sums it up very well.
http://robdelaney.tumblr.com/post/34643328161/after-sandy


Last Wednesday we took Ryan trick or treating for the first time. We went over to Mike and Janets to meet up with the girls.

 Alexandra and Chloe 

Sloane

Oh no, we dropped the bucket. Oh it was empty? Thats okay then.

After having a snack we were off. Ryan was a little worried at the first door but by the second he wants to hold the bucket, knock on doors and grab his own candy. He didn't even really know what candy was he just knew if he knocked on a door a grown up told him he was super cute and put stuff in his bucket or let him grab stuff.

 Ryan in the dragon outfit getting the hang of it.

 CANDY! (love Ryans face here)

 The group.

Ryan got really good at saying "trick or treat" and "thank you". Sounds more like "tickteet" and "tankyou" but it was still super cute.

I went up with Ryan to one house and helped him knock on the door, the guy saw my outline and thought it was older kids. He puts on a scary mask and throws open the door and sees four small kids 3 years of age and under and pulls of the mask goes "oh my, I am so sorry!" and puts the bowl out of good chocolate for the kids to get one. Ry looks at me, I say"its okay buddy go ahead." he takes one. He looks at me again... and reaches in to grab with a little toddler hand and get three bars! He puts it in his bucket, he goes to do it again. I try to stop him and tell him that is a little greedy, the guy holding the candy is laughing and telling me to let him! I smile and tell Ryan to say thank you and very embarrassedly scoot Ryan on to the next house.

This is the bucket of candy Ryan kept grabbing from, I am to the left with him trying to push/pull his hand away from the bucket gently.

It was a VERY fun night! After about 10 houses and some very full buckets we went back to Mike and Janet. Here is Mike. hehe

Or Doctor Park to some of you. (with his youngest daughter, the cupcake) yes he is dressed as an egg.

Janet had to stay home to hand out the candy to visiting kids.

Here are some cute shots of the kids enjoying the spoils of trick or treating.

 Mmmmmm chips.

Sloane is not big on eating candy but she LOVES the smell.

 SNNNNNNIIIIIFFFFFFFF

Alexandra likes the candy though. YUM!!! Good choice!

Janet enjoying the treats too. heh

Ryan just wants to ride the BMW. Another good choice!

It was so much fun. The next night Ryan was being so good he got Smarties for the first time, big shocker is that he liked them.

______________________________________________________________________

On to his 18 month check up and new awesome things he is doing.

Doc said he is big. He is about 3lbs over where he should be. So we cut his whole milk to 2% and cut it back big time. Or at least are trying to. I am also trying to cut back on carbs for him, he LOVES carbs so we are trying new stuff like red pepper or cucumber when we get home. He will be so hungry he will be shaking and crying so he gets a snack. Doc told me to stop letting him snack. I explained he gets two a day. One at school and one when he gets home and stuff like Banana, yogurt or apple. He was like "oh then thats okay." Bloody hell, its not like I am giving him ice cream and a bowl of crack. It's a friggn apple.

However just switching the milk will help a lot. (water no juice, not a fan of juice). If Ryan hasn't pooped I give him 1/3 pear juice and 2/3 water. Always does the trick.
Other then the 'weight issue' he is healthy.

On to changes.

He is growing up, what feels like, to fast. Eats with a fork or spoon or at least trying to. Gets mad when I try to feed him (I CAN do it mom!). Understands when he hurts me or does something he shouldn't (more later on this). Liked to give a treat to Roag (our kitty boy). Is starting to comunicate with me so much better. (more on this too). Loves to drink out of moms glass.

Sorry mom...
Yesterday Christina and Robin were over for dinner. (sister/brother in law). After dinner Christina, Ry and I were in the living room/sunroom. Ryan grabs my glasses and starts to twist them. I say something like "RYAN NO, those are moms glasses, DO NOT TOUCH, you know better." He gives them to me. I go on my knees and say to him " buddy those are moms only glasses, you know better then to touch, they are not a toy for you, okay hon." Ryan looks at me and says softly "sorry". I say to him. "buddy I am not mad at you, thank you for giving them back to mom, can I get a hug?" he hugs me and then we tickle fight.
It was epic. Other parents will get how HUGE this is. Hell I think even non-parents will get how huge this is.

I WANT IT...

This morning I take Ryan out of the crib, change his diaper (all the while he is chatting and laughing as I ask him about his night). I pick him up and as we leave the room he starts to cry. I go into the living room and set him down. I say "bud, you have to use your words or show mom what is upsetting you, do you want to show me?" and I hold my hand out. He grabs my hand and leads me back into his bedroom. He points at the computer mouse on the floor Neil gave him to play with and goes "da?" I tell him its okay to grab it. He smiles, laughs, picks it up, grabs my hand and we go back into the living room to play. I sit down with him and tell him thank you for showing mommy what upset him and he can always show mommy or tell mommy what he is upset about. Then he follows me in to the kitchen  points at where we keep Roags (cat) treat and says cat in Hungarian and apple (apple is his word for food). We take the treats out and Ryan gives a few to Roag. Ryan laughs, asks for some Cheerios and drink. Takes them to his table in the sunroom, sits down and eats them while I am making breakfast.

It's insane.

It's so cool.

I love it.

Response to Emily and other topics/ramblings.

My buddy Emily has a new blog. (newish mom!)
 She wrote this post and I was writing a reply and then realized my reply was longer then her post. Figured I would just post in my blog since its been way too long.
http://minkflamingos.com/2012/10/20/im-in-your-relationship-dropping-bombs


Wonderful post. And all very very true. As you (most of you) know Ryan was a breast feed baby. I was very adamant about that, we both were. So those first few days are so hard. Then the first few weeks. Neil would work all day, come home and help me, and then make us dinner and even feed me while I tried to feed Ryan. It's really about a united front, still is and I think always will be.

Couples that are on the verge of splitting and have a baby really confuse the shit out of me. Really?! You think having a completely dependent being is going to keep you together. BULLSHIT. When neither of you get sleep for 3 weeks and you find yourself arguing over who got more sleep last night that is the reality of having a kid.
"I was up at 1am feeding the baby and you were snoring, I remember, I put it in my iPhone app. It was so annoying and hard to not kill you."
"Really because I was up at 1:15 when Ryan cried and you were sleeping away and you were farting in your sleep." Then I would pull out my iPhone and open my "what to expect" app and show him exactly when I feed ryan, on what boob and when he went back to sleep.
Yes I was a freak those first few months. No surprise there.

You get shit on, literally, barfed on, sore nipples, blisters, not wanting to eat, not being able to eat enough, zombie like brain function, pissed you ran out of wipes and it's just when the kid took a huge dump and it's everywhere, mad you are home with the baby and hubby gets to escape to work, mad the wife gets to nap during the day, try to keep the house somewhat cleanish, make sure you are feed too, oh is that barf on your shirt? Well it's just one or two spots so it's clean enough, wash your hair every 3 days because you rather try to sleep... and so on. All the while bleeding, healing stitches and dealing with crazy hormones. (not to mention being aware you are crazy and feeling guilt over that.)

One thing I should mention, my son is 18 months old. (1 1/2 to you non-parents). And it's AWESOME. Yes we have a whole new bundle of issues, you always will. (NO HITTING RYAN!) But it's so awesome when he says "whatisthat mama?" (always wanting to learn) or when I get him from day care and he comes RUNNING when he sees me. The hugs, the dancing together, colouring on a piece of paper, him stealing all my food and I don't give a crap cause he is eating, laughing and then him laughing at me laughing and back and forth, running in circles cause is fun, hide and seek, tickling each other... it's amazing. Nothing like it in the world. I can not express completely how it makes you feel.

One thing to take away from this is; always ask how the dad is doing. No one ever asks the father "Hey man, how you holding up?" It's hard when a baby is breast feed and the dad can't really help they just see the mom going crazy (what happened to my wife?!). It's hard when you are up all night with a kid and then have to work and then come home to watch the kid (you can't feed) so your wife can nap or shower or just take a poop. Then said baby screams at you cause YOU do not have boobs and they just want mom and you just want everyone to be happy and to sleep. Dads are always under-appreciated.

When I was in labor I remembered hearing that, no one every worries about the husband/male. I did. I asked Neil how he was doing. I knew it was exciting/stressful/joyous/worried time for him. Being that Ryan was not our first birth I knew he was a little worried. We knew what was at risk. Watching the heart rate on the baby drop so low he was worried, seeing the crash cart and the always slight risk he might lose me, maybe both of us, I knew my husband was worried. The feeling of helplessness. Nothing he could do but stand by my side, hold my leg up and NOT LOOK DOWN THERE. Smile at me and tell me it was going to be alright. I had to ask if he was okay. I remember him laughing, the nurse and doctor being shocked I was worried about him. Why wouldn't I be? He is my best friend and this was something we were embarking on together.


Hmmmmm looks like two glasses of German wine makes me chatty and full of nostalgia. Chalk it up to wine, turning 35 next month and wine.
Oh I already said wine.

heh.

In unrelated news. I took my Canadian Citizenship test Friday. I am pretty sure I missed three questions. One I know for sure I missed. Oh well I can miss up to five and still pass. I should get a letter in 3-5 months. I will keep my US so I will be dual citizenship. Very exciting.
A HUGE step in securing my family since my husband is Canadian and my son is Canadian born.