I am writing this with any new moms in my thoughts.
Breast feeding is HARD. Its painful, exhausting, stressful and takes a lot of your time and time you could be sleeping... when you first start.
Breast feeding is really pushed HARD in Canada. And the good thing is there is a lot of information and help out there if you have problems. (Free help)
Breast feeding is really pushed HARD in Canada. And the good thing is there is a lot of information and help out there if you have problems. (Free help)
That being said I am really happy I stuck with it. There were so many times I almost gave up.
Ryan was born with a tongue tie which didn't make it any better. He could latch great but he couldn't use his tongue to scoop the nipple and suck. This lead to him feeding for, not kidding here, HOURS and causing me to have blisters on my nipples.
I dreaded feeding him. (not anymore yay!)
Our son also has an oral fixation where he will want to nurse but the milk will just flow out of his mouth. We gave him a pacifier at 2 weeks which helped me to keep breast feeding him. (I keep track of when he eats to make sure he is getting enough food and if he is hungry he will spit out the pacifier and make sure YOU KNOW he wants the boob)
We were so scared about 'nipple confusion' we used a dropper to give him formula between feedings before my milk came in. After my milk came in we were okay just waiting to get his tongue fixed.
After his tongue was fixed it got MUCH better. He would eat for 10-20 min and de-latch himself.
After a good burping he was a pretty happy kid. And I was a really happy mom.
Also around the 2 week mark we gave him a bottle for the first time.
Mixing a bottle before bed, my breast feeding him all day and at night, and a pacifier did not confuse him. We are lucky that he will eat breast milk or formula. He is not picky.
I know the many many benefits of breast feeding and I agree is the best for a child. That being said I think its horrid how you are made to feel if you do use formula. My lactation consultant called it "fast food" filling but not good for you. I disagree. I don't think its evil. Granted I only give him 1 bottle of it at night about 99% of the time its breast. Sometimes on a weekend if we are out I will give him some formula but that's pretty rare. I am in the habit of taking my pump with me to friends houses and giving him a bottle of fresh pumped breast milk if need be.
It pissed me off when people said breast feeding should not hurt and if it does you are doing it wrong. Bullshit. Anything sucking on your nipples for 20min at 12 times a day is going to hurt. You are not a bad mother.
Try to stick with it, its worth it and you will BOTH get the swing of it. And if you have to have a break and give a bottle of formula you are not a bad mom. I felt like I was, like I was letting him down. Looking back now that was stupid. Food is food, some food is better for you but not letting your kid go hungry is the best.
Also breast feeding is super convenient. Nothing to warm up, no bottles to sterilize, no waiting and having the kid get really upset and cry. You just pop a boob in the mouth and you are good to go.
I know its cheesy but I also feel this bond with him. I give him food. One of the most basic needs any living thing has, but not just the food... I will rub his back while he eats, or talk to him. I get to have this awesome bond with him no one else gets to have. Oh Neil feeds him also but this is straight from my body to his. It's pretty cool and a little gross.
So moral of the story. DO NOT FEEL BAD for getting frustrated or feeling like giving up or even giving up. I do promise you that it does get better. Try your very best to stick it out and you will get used to it (pain gets better and pretty much goes away with time) and the baby will get better at it too. Its new to you both. Don't be so hard on yourself if you can't keep it up. You are not a bad mom.
:)
Also breast feeding is super convenient. Nothing to warm up, no bottles to sterilize, no waiting and having the kid get really upset and cry. You just pop a boob in the mouth and you are good to go.
I know its cheesy but I also feel this bond with him. I give him food. One of the most basic needs any living thing has, but not just the food... I will rub his back while he eats, or talk to him. I get to have this awesome bond with him no one else gets to have. Oh Neil feeds him also but this is straight from my body to his. It's pretty cool and a little gross.
So moral of the story. DO NOT FEEL BAD for getting frustrated or feeling like giving up or even giving up. I do promise you that it does get better. Try your very best to stick it out and you will get used to it (pain gets better and pretty much goes away with time) and the baby will get better at it too. Its new to you both. Don't be so hard on yourself if you can't keep it up. You are not a bad mom.
:)
This is a really good perspective for me to know! I occasionally see breastfeeding moms and this type of info keeps me more objective. Thanks :)
ReplyDeleteI used to be a little freaked out too by women that breast feed in public but now I get it. I will never pop my boob out though, I always have a cover on and the kid under it. And I always ask my friends before I go to their homes if its okay if I breast feed and if it's not I will bring my pump and pump and bottle feed.
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So fat no one has been freaked out by it that is close to us.
You are such an awesome mom! Love you!!
ReplyDeleteJ
Update on this. Ryan stopped taking the bottle from me not long after I wrote this post. He clued in pretty fast mom is the boob and boob is much yummier. Now he is almost 9 months old and will drink from a sippy cup. I am in the process of weaning him since that top tooth is starting to pop in. I was so silly in thinking I would only feed him for a few months. I love breast feeding him. I will miss that bond with him when its gone.
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